Recently in Mean Boys Category

As most of everybody who's anybody knows, last weekend was Toronto Pride '06. I would have made note of this sooner but I've been sick since Saturday night. The week started off fine. I could feel my throat getting sore as early as Tuesday so I started popping anti-sick pills until the feeling went away. So when I was downtown on Friday and in little to no pain I was ecstatic. It looked like I was going to make it through the weekend without having to curl up into a ball around Gill's legs and cry myself to sleep. Instead I got to party!

I did party. In fact, we partied a lot. One might even say we partied too much. Ok I take that back. Almost everyone would say we partied too much. To start the weekend off in style we predrank in our hotel room, because predrinking is what all the cool kids do? Right. Please tell me you all got the memo saying nothing is cooler than drinking to a really crappy radio that can only play 99.9 and 104.5? You're just not cool then.

After that we went over to Spring Rolls on Yonge. I had Pad Thai and Asahi because I love Pad Thai and I love Asahi. I'd never been to Spring Rolls before so I wasn't sure what to expect. The Pad Thai itself was a little citrusier and a little less peanuty than I thought I would like but I've found myself craving it over the last few days since I've been home. Eric wore my shirt because I have sweet clothes.

When we were done we went to see where the festivities were. Adam was hoping to get into Crews & Tango only I hate Crews & Tango. So I whined until we went to Fly. It was a good choice on my part, for me. I went in there with no money in my pockets, and walked out drunk off my ass. This is more of an assumption than anything else because while I remember the beginning of Grapefruit at Fly, and have no idea what the end was like - at all. I remember getting lots of drinks, and being groped a lot by different people throughout the night. That's it though.

Today before work, Miguel messaged me saying that I was mean and shouldn't be posting meanness in JD's livejournal. So I'm sitting here thinking "Miguel, what crack are you smoking?" because I don't even remember what JD's livejournal was. Of course to go and find it, I have to jump back two user names and check my friends list because Miguel is too busy loving the potential drama to give me the link.

So I found it myself (http://triplesevyn.livejournal.com/7161.html).

I'd like to point out a series of flaws in this comment. Skipping the fact that I couldn't remember his livejournal link, because there's no way to verify that we'll start with what is verifiable. The comment, posted by someone anonymous, was made at 4:56pm local time on May 17th. Where was I at 4:56pm local time on May 17th? That would be slaving away at work making smoothies for people who don't care, and doing crosswords with the girl from Reebok. Not posting some horribly lame comment on a livejournal.

Second, I'd like to ask a question. Why would I post a comment not logged into my account, and sign it with HALF my old screen name? Considering that my computer loves me and never logs me out in return for protection from creepy people.

Now the contents of the comment look familiar, and I have a horrible feeling I'm inviting drama into my life again, but a google search on two old LJs, and this site only show results about how I'm a big loser. Although I can't think of why I would say "total loser" - big loser is more of my thing.

Most importantly for me is the fact that I would TOTALLY own up to any drama that I'm trying to start. Don't believe me? Ask Ms. Fischer about it.

Fucking people.

If you're dating a skeezebag, and said skeezebag does something really skeezebaggy – don't come and complain about it. It would be one thing if you had no idea you were dating a skeezebag, or if you were only dating him because he was there (in which case you probably cheated on him god knows how many times anyways). But for me to know that you genuinely liked him, and knew that he was a huge skeezebag going into it makes me question what form of logic you were operating on when he broke you. Just be lucky he didn't give you anything. Actually, you might want to go get tested just in case.

List up to ten (10) things you want to say to ten (10) different people in no particular order. Do not state who these people are. Do not confirm or deny any 'comment speculation.'

For those of you fortunate enough to read Adam's most recent pseudo essay on gays and immigrant gays in Oakville, you would have known from the beginning that I was bound to comment on it. When has someone said 'gays' 'Oakville' and 'Adam' in the same sentence and not heard me have something to say on the subject? A whole pseudo essay on how the Sheridan Music Theatre program is ruining life for the rest of us is like Christmas come early. No, I take that back. My new The Mike Haddad Show Tshirts arriving today is like Christmas come early. The pseudo essay is like temporarily dying and going to heaven.

Just a side note on Adam's blog: for the longest time I tried to convince him that he should upgrade to a fully fledged, avec domain name, blog. I wasn't the only one telling him how witty he was. Unfortunately it got to his head, then he started slacking, and now you never get anything new. The moral of the story? Don't compliment anyone – ever.

So Adam wrote a very scathing post about people are coming to Oakville to take Sheridan's Music Theatre Program, telling people they meet they're from Oakville, being a stereotypical Music Theatre Whore and having sex with everyone, and pretty much ruining it for the rest of us. Yes, I'm referring to the ones that are "promiscuous, with sugar-daddies, secret-boyfriends, and secret-girlfriends."

Then it dawned on me just how hypocritical we just might be. For a group of people that claims to hate generalizations made about them, we sure are quick to generalize. I'm using 'we' in two senses here: Adam and Myself, and the greater homosexual population of Toronto's suburbs.

Introduce me to a Music Theatre student and you'll find me hard pressed to not think about how he's most likely had sex with everyone else in his program, and then talked about it, using the excuse that "it's ok because it's music theatre." Yes, and just because they change in front of each other all the time sports teams everywhere are all promiscuous team-cest loving whores too. Sure I try to be friendly, but I usually just make due by insulting someone else while they're around. It's the best way to ignore the voices in my head screaming at me. "They're hitting on you and they know you're dating him" and "They're going to hit on him now because you're not interested" are the two most common. Fuckers.

Yet even in writing this my conscience is kicking me in the face. I'd be hard pressed to name more than three that I really don't like, and even those ones are still for the same reasons. Only they're like the Queen Bee's of the Music Theatre Whoredom so it's easier to focus it all on them.

The bigger problem is just who much we generalize. I'm doing it again right now in saying 'we' and implying that we all generalize, but for the most part we do. I'm more interested in finding out what caused the generalizations. We all know Whitby is full of hustlers who can probably give you an assortment of STDs by breathing on you, that there's a lot of really hot people in Newmarket, and that people in Woodbridge have oddly shaped penises that are only pleasurable to people from Ottawa who like sleeping with their best friend's ex-boyfriends. How'd it happen? Did the city planners say "Ok, we want to focus on getting parents with really whorey kids to move here" or did it just happen. If it did just happen, why continue it? I've met one person in all of my experiences with people who was from Whitby and wasn't a whore. Not looking good for the town that wants to be Oakville. More than that: it doesn't look good for the next generation of homos.

Don't expect me to help though. I foresee far too much potential humour to stop it.

So I may have figured out why Adam's blogs do so well. It's not just that he's cold and bitter, and hates everyone; it's beyond the fact that he recounts various tales of excitement and intrigue from his hyper-active, rambunctious youth. It's the fact that he consistently makes fun of my personality traits and past decisions. What a jerkface.

Over the past few weeks I've found myself agitated by little things. The problem with these little things is that not one single evernt or person pisses me off enough to give me reason to vent my frustrations. That is of course until one person happens to do something to push me over the top, allowing me to vent all my frustrations on that poor soul. Or even worse, when someone happens to be around when I reach that point and I take it out on them just because they're there. I'm a great person like that.

So I thought long and hard about it until I came up with this. Inspired by a Seinfeld episode I can hardly remember, I present to you the very first Airing of Grievances. At first I was thinking about following a format: one thing about myself, one thing about a person or thing, and one about people in general. That would have gone well for all of five minutes.

I realized I didn't want to be obliged to admit all my faults to the whole world. Better to admit it silently and try to fix it, only mentioning major, amusing or major-ly amusing problems. Second was the fact that all the things that I could think of that bothered me about one person were usually traits of an easily stereotyped group of people. Pointing on person out using traits from a whole group of people is just asking for trouble in the form of that person showing up at your house with one million punches for your face. So instead I'm going to just put whatever I want to out there, and work from there.

For those of you who've never been to homohop, and for those of you who haven't even seen a drag queen, it's hard to explain what happened last night. Drag queens have a tendency to perform songs that are either really popular at the moment or are old school classics. Perform also means perform, not sing, because it's very rare for a drag queen to actually sing. Instead they just stand on stage and pretend to sing to a track they love.

So last night at the homohop you can understand why I expected another cheesy, overplayed pop hit for the show. Something like Ashlee Simpson, Pink, Britney or Madonna. Instead I got smacked on the head by the song that came on. There was a second girl on the stage, and it took a while to understand why someone was saying "Elphaba, why couldn't you stay calm for once?!"

I know exactly who Elphaba is. Anyone who spends as much time with Sheridan students as I do would know. I can't even begin to tell you how many times I've heard the soundtrack to Wicked, but I can tell you that it's only slightly less than the number of times that I've heard people sing along to it. I mean, Nancy and Jeremy had spent most of the day singing songs from Wicked. Partly because I'm so sick and tired of Rent, and partly because they know I love it.

So standing near the back of the crowd with about ten other Sheridan students, it was like being caught in an explosion when it clicked in their heads what was going on. If you thought people could normally scream loud, then you've never heard music theatre students scream when a drag queen performs a song from a musical. So as the show went on up on the stage, we stood in a horribly formed circle singing along at the top of our lungs. I'm not sure what the best part was: the fact that Defying Gravity was on, the fact that we were singing, or the fact that most of the other people were too tasteless to even know what was going on. No, that's a lie. The best part was when I got the witch's hat at the end of the night.

But first, I'd like to take this opportunity to tell you all that Adam is a big tool and a douche.

Now, my issues with PETA go back to the time they started handing out bloody chicken heads to little children in an attempt to traumatize them so they would stop eating at KFC. Yes, because traumatizing children is a perfect way to gain the support of the normal people that make up the majority of the world. I had this discussion (argument) over and over again with Barone in that class we took with the really hot teacher in grade 12. When it comes down to it, there's nothing evil about fur. Fur is not murder. PETA needs to get over it.

In my attempt to find blogs to read that were updated regularly and actually interesting to read (and coherent for that matter), I came across Bryanboy: Le Superstar Fabuleux. His posts, much like Xiaxue's are fun to read because like Xiaxue, he lives a lifestyle that most people only dream of. It's also easy to ignore the fact that he's dangerously twinky allowing for an enjoyable read. At least until you get to his comments.

Since Bryanboy lives the lifestyle of the rich and fabulous, he tends to buy a lot of nice things; especially when it comes to bags and furs. Now, I doubt I would ever wear fur because it's totally not my thing and there's no way I could do it without looking incredibly tacky. At the same time I totally admit that there are some people who can put on something with fur and they end up looking about a bajillion times hotter than you (give or take a few million). He also likes to post pictures of all of these things and as you all know, jealous people get bitter. Jealous people get bitter, and animal rights activists are crazy. So they post comments like this one over and over on as many entries as they can:

There is a special place in hell reserved for you, you stuck up, superficial, shallow, egotistical douchebag.
You much have a huge ego to think that animals should have to die so you can feel "fabulous". There is nothing fabulous about wearing the chemically preserved carcass of an animal who was slaughtered in some brutal way such as gassing, suffocation, live skinning, or anal electrocution (which I think you would probably enjoy a little too much). Hopefully there is such thing as karma or hell so you can feel the horrible pain and fear that those animals felt at the hands of snobby fur hags like yourself.
You are a sick person and you should be skinned alive for what you do and the fur you endorse. Do the world a favor and die.

Posted by: Sky

Unfortunately for us, Sky didn't leave an email so I could sign him up for porn spam. And unfortunately for Sky, Bryanboy is the kind of person like Xiaxue (and Julie Cooper) who thrives off of that kind of attention. And I'm sure that it helps knowing he looks great while he does it too.

BUT! Fortunately for us, I'm cranky for reasons that I will not divulge right now, so I have the time and energy to spend making fun of PETA and people like Sky. Don't get me wrong, animal cruelty is a horrible thing. But fur isn't murder, and Bryanboy isn't going to hell for wearing it. How do I know this? I have the internet, and the internet provides me access to the Catholic Culture Website. That's right, I went so far as to spend time reading an article on a catholic website just so that I could prove to you that wearing fur doesn't mean Bryanboy, or anyone else for that matter, a horrible person. It just proves that the psychos PETA really are psycho.

Recognizing the distinction then between a person and an animal, and following the principle of stewardship, animals can be used for labor, transportation, food, clothing or other needs. Sacred Scripture has numerous examples of human beings using animals in each of these ways, including clothing: In Genesis, after the fall of Adam and Eve, we read, "For the man and his wife, the Lord God made leather garments, with which he clothed them" (Gn 2:21). Also, St. John the Baptizer is also described as wearing fur: "John was clothed in a garment of camel’s hair and wore a leather belt around his waist" (Mt 3:4). Given this basis, there is nothing intrinsically wrong in wearing a fur coat just as there is nothing intrinsically wrong with eating meat.

While we respect all creation and must use creation wisely, the key is "we can use it." Following the principle of stewardship, nothing is intrinsically wrong with using animals wisely for labor, transportation, clothing, food or other needs. We must always remember the distinction between human beings and animals and use good reason and judgment when using animals.

Catholic Culture: Cruelty toward Animals

Well would you look at that. Wearing fur really isn't murder. PETA's just psycho and it would figure that most of their members are religiously ignorant and just use their religion as a tool to hate everyone else. I bet they really hate those damn homos and coloured people too. They can all they want, so I can laugh at them. It will never change the fact that I ♥s Bryanboy.

[ picture when I can upload to flickr again ]